Friday, October 20, 2017

because you do not ask.

because you do not ask, you do not know. and simply because you do not give, you can never receive. all along our journey we are given opportunity to extend open hands of compassion, yet more often than not they remain clinched behind our backs - anticipation of need for resistance.
and sometimes,
while we travel, situations allow capacity for camaraderie. why is it, instead of forming allegiance, we feel compelled to stand alone - bastions of implied sovereignty?
how sad, to realize too late our blessings. to find ourselves standing in front of the gate - access denied. and all because we chose the long way home - ended up late for the pageantry - planned oh so long ago for our arrival...

 of prayer...


disenchanted and disillusioned,
we grasp at strands of compassion as the very footing of humanity crumbles beneath us.
fearing the absolute worst,
we run away from the scene of the crime rather than face the source of the fear -
fight the wrong.
and as we stumble in our haste to escape,
we find ourselves even further from the sanctuary of hope than when we began...

i pray for you -
i pray for me -
i pray;
one day soon -
though our eyes have been closed by choice -
we will see the path that leads to our salvation.
i seem to have an extra shovel -
lend a hand?
a grave for animosity -
another for indifference.
don't we owe it to ourselves?
freedom?
no longer slaves to fear.
redemption -
recompense -
you do not have,
simply because you do not ask...

Thursday, October 19, 2017

the contradiction of my current situation...

some nights the words - held hostage. perhaps the thoughts they feel conviction to express - too deliberate. maybe, their message intended for another day - different audience.
whatever the reason,
tonight i will allow them to their own particular connotations.
tonight i will simply close the door,
exit this room of thought.
tonight i will - choose -
simply,
excerpt from another conversation -
aptly expressing -
the contradiction of my current situation...

_____________________________________________________

Wednesday, February 1, 2017

in regards to your - assumption.



excerpt from someone else's story you may or may not know...

suppose -
verb (used without object),
to assume something; presume; think.
"obstinate, don't you think, for you to stand outside the door to this dark room, toss randomly - like wooden matches flicked - your insinuations? ludicrous, to presume yourself companion to my indifference. you do not bare the scars of my assumed indiscretion. and nowhere in the book of you is there evidence to support incidence of (misconstrued) self-deprecation. 
if not for lack of care, i would invest more time into a study of your contradiction. but knowing at the end of the day, the conviction you suggest is nothing more than a mask your insensitivity holds residence behind.
careless of you - to suppose.
when invitation was given without obligation to sit in audience to know."
departure


you hide behind your - suppose -
as if it were a shroud,
seemingly unaware of the audacity -
imposed by your flagrant transparency...

how awkward -
meeting here like this -
exposing all my is,
to find it wasted effort to your - presume!

when did the lines become so blurred?
boundaries,
redefined?
we used to travel the same path -
shared the same - once upon a time...

dangling now -
contemplating the letting go -
while you callously take flight on wings of indifference.

surely there is no sadness more intense
than dying -
without death!

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

life - with no apologies.

and sometimes in the darkness, we strive to shine our light. however small the arc - regardless the distance of shadows cast. by some, our contribution considered courageous - uncompromising. for however long the assigned tenure, we share accommodation - travel in search of sunrise - dawn's reprieve from what seems never-ending midnight. it's those alliances shared without conflict of obligation that nurture hope - rekindle fires of compassion from embers of deceit.
yet,
sometimes - in the darkness - our light, diminished, compromised.
what purpose - then - the striking of the match?
more relevant, to be considered necessary -
unassuming -
valued for the composition of the vessel -
 regardless temporal accoutrement of perceived illumination...



 misappropriation

sometimes the message -
heard - clearly -
without deviation.
sometimes the message heard,
regardless intention.
and sometimes,
the message heard loudest - by presentation of silence.

so often we find ourselves pushing the envelope -
forcing opinion to define avenues of compromise.
insistent upon leading the way out of our own particular darkness,
we fail to authenticate the owner of the light.
we claim victory over battles we think we've won -
recite prayers admonishing acts of immorality perceived.
hide behind hands folded -
allegiance offered to ritual -
ineffective as should..

sometimes -
the message speaks contradiction -
offers dissension from predetermined priorities -
redirects allegiance to acts of faith,
rather than insurgence of self-serving conquests by manipulation.

it's in those moments -
we find ourselves face to face with humility -
realize the meaning -
not by shouts.
not necessarily written on walls.
spoken, 
instead -
benevolent -
sincere,
intimate as a whisper...

Monday, October 16, 2017

the irrelevance of (your) opinion.

and some days, we simply do not own enough - give - for the owners of the take. no matter the persuasion of our plea, the words remain hollow. what then becomes of our empty reservoir of care? what do we use to fill the absence of relevance? perhaps the time will come when matter shares accommodation once again with our us.
 just maybe, this drought of disconnect is merely intermission - prelude to season of reaffirmation.
while painful - lessons learned; books of inappropriately penned letters of (mis-)perceived character - convince us to guard our hearts - retain ownership of our compassion.
irrelevant - suggestion of misconstrued. while respectful of your right to disengage, there is no contract signed requiring allegiance to your opinion. at the end of the day, grateful am i, for the ability to lay down my shield - content to sleep unencumbered - UN-tethered to walls of ignorant supposition...


epitaphs of discontent


we wear our coats of like.
dust off our eager shoes -
step into the arena of ego.
impatiently aware of how we look in the mirror of our suppose.

with disregard for others want,
we impose our need-to-be.
consideration -
program from the pageant of youth -
crumpled,
thrown out the window.

how quickly we become -
undone;
companion to indifference.
no compromise.
no regret.
determined to win the race -
regardless the casualties.

and even now -
with sunset inviting darkness,
we light one more candle.
no time for rest.
insatiable -
our appetite for admiration.

just one more round of applause.
one more like -
clicked on sad page of immaterial.
and recklessly -
with impetuous abandon -
we (without knowing) write epitaphs of discontent -
chiseled in stone (alone).

our un-intention -
our demise.
and from this dreamless sleep,
no waking...